Stress happens and is independent of an audience. Loneliness can be stressful. Little Websters says stress – to put pressure or strain on. When we put pressure or strain on, all kinds of things can happen, including cracks and even break downs. Stress can be (contextually) positive or negative. Ask any new parent, a new child is stressful. An infant puts all kinds of pressure on sleeping, eating, scheduling and even just driving to the store. Stress may have a neutral cause, yet it puts strain on the system, most usually the body. By now, don’t we all know what stress can do to the body? Stress, quite literally, can kill us and does, quite literally, end many lives prematurely.
Trauma, according to the little Webster – injury, usually caused by an external agent. Hmm, injury – an act that damages or hurts: wrong. Not sure why right or wrong is relevent, if you have suffered an injury, it hurts – plain and simple – that.
I can’t exactly qualify or quantify what constitutes trauma, but I know that it is not a broken fingernail, nor is it my child receiving a “C” on his report card. When I think of the word trauma, my mind automatically goes to other words like rape, death of a loved one, surviving combat in a war or being beaten severely. Car accidents are often traumatizing, bankruptcy or losing your home, these things can be traumatizing. Trauma, like stress, does not require an audience, just ask a rape victim, they often tell no one of their injuries, or even an incest survivor, who indeed told no one for years.
The issue that I began with is that there is a REAL difference between drama, stress and trauma. So many people I know choose drama and stress. No one chooses trauma and those who have suffered a trauma certainly, normally, feel stressed. It’s the drama that I am protesting against, it’s the drama that I find tiring and ruinous. Who cares if your husband didn’t call you sweetheart today, move on. I don’t want to be an audience to it any more. I understand stress, I understand trauma, it’s drama that I just don’t get. Drama is a production that some one makes in order to get attention and they will pretend that stress and trauma have taken over their life. ENOUGH already, stop it with the drama. Real trauma is hard enough to deal with, why add to it? Life is stressful, yes. No need to pump it up with drama…
But listen, if you don’t stop the drama, that’s okay. I’m just not going to be an audience.