Archives for September 2017

24Sep

An Egomaniacal Personality Makes You a Liar

In the world, when we are mindful, we cannot help but be aware of what is wrong and more important, what we have done wrong.  It can be as simple as buying the wrong dish towels for the kitchen.  It can also be as important as hiring the wrong assistant, one who hates you and spends all day, every day, trying to destroy your career.

We make mistakes, we are, as the poets put it, only human.  If you are mindful, this information about being human, can also keep you humble.  It is not as if you are less than any other, it is not as if you should bow down to any other.  It is only that we are, as human beings, all of life’s possibilities.  No one person gets to have all of what is good, or fun or bright.  We all must carry our burden, we all must make mistakes and we all will make very wrong decisions.

If we are single, bereft of family, our faulty decisions are of little matter to anyone but our own self.  However, if we are influential, then our own decision may be of some import to others.  The more influential, the higher the import, the more who will be affected by our decisions.  Again, sometimes, these decisions can be very wrong.

If you are egomaniacal, you will not believe any truth which disparages your perfection.  You will deny all which denies your perfection, often fabricating lies to prop up their own point of view.

Take “Papa John”, he loves capitalism and won’t hear a word about interdependence.  He believes that his ownership entitles him to using other human beings as indentured servants.  He lives in a 40,00 square foot home and pays his staff 7.25 per hour.  He thinks that he is entitled to every single profit that his company makes.  He has threatened to pass the costs of “Obamacare” onto his franchisees.  It does not occur to “Papa John”  that his wealth is dependent upon the sweat and hard work of others.  All wealth ‘belongs’ to him.  It does not occur to him that his well-being is a reflection of interdependence with the rest of the world.  He has adopted the rule of capitalism and will defend it to his dying breath.  Why?  Because it allows him to take all, without the guilt of greed on his conscience.  He believes in capitalism and will fight for the right to pay his staff poverty wages and to ensure that his staff cannot access health care.  He has made this reality his right as an American in a capitalist culture.

He will never admit that he creates poverty.  He will never admit that the family members of his staff die because they do not have access to health care.  He will never admit that he has created undeserved wealth for himself using unethical laws in a country that does not care for the weak and poverty stricken.

The egomaniac knows only his own truth.  It does not matter to the egomaniac that his truth is singular, it is his truth.

17Sep

Why Do We Have to be Strong A.L.L. the Time?

It is as if, there is shame in weakness.  Worse yet, illness is a condemnable offense.  I don’t understand this, because as mothers, we realize that there are good days and bad days.  As mothers, we don’t hesitate to provide love and care to our family members no matter who and what they are, or how they behave.

My challenge is this: why aren’t we women defining society?  We understand, we acknowledge the different faces of the human condition.  As women, we should be defining the societal structures of being human in America.  It’s ok to be weak, it’s ok to be sick, it’s ok to be ignorant, why add insult to injury and shame those less capable than the strong?

This strength thing has become its own illness, in the sense that lots of people say and think, “I don’t need anyone and I don’t need anything.”  This can go past the point of wisdom and could even cause self harm.  Look at those who die after refusing medical help, or women who are murdered by a husband or boyfriend because they refuse to go to the police?

This norm of strength is fostered by our society.  Perhaps it is the pushback from the way people are treated when they are in economic need.  Our society is not very nice to the poverty stricken, but again that is because we all believe in this notion that strength is enough to overcome anything.

Needy people are normally put down, made fun of, ostracized and of course, they are deprived of very real and very normal opportunities.  This can become a hamster wheel of frustration along with denial that keeps those in need – in need.

How do we balance all of this out?  Strength and weakness, need and satisfaction?  How do we ensure equality in spite of the fact that not all humans are strong?  Those that are strong, what price do they pay to exhibit that strength?

Mother and Son, modern life

15Sep

To Women Everywhere

PinterestMM by WarholI hope you are beautiful for as long as you want to be.  And I hope that when you lose your beauty that you love yourself enough that you don’t care what happened to your beauty.

I hope you admire the beauty in others.  I hope you know that you are as important as any other human being and as important, that you treat other women as if they are important also.

We deserve to be loved for our being.  We don’t deserve to be thrown away at age 40.  We have the power and with each other, we are ridiculously strong.  It is up to us to redefine the social structure.  It’s up to us to make women important, to make beauty unimportant.  It is up to us to give meaning to just being.

We can’t possibly create equality if women will not support each other.  It is just too difficult to navigate through society and to deal with another woman’s hatred, jealousy or condescension.  How can we show the world women’s strength and power, if what we do to each other is brutal?

So please be beautiful inside and out, proud and happy with your looks, with your brain and with other women.  It’s our only route to equality and ultimately to equanimity.