I left my boyfriend of so many years to move to Virginia. In a post-break-up conversation he is telling me how hard it is to date. He has many regrets, and he is contemplating that if he had treated me like he has to treat his dates, I would not be in Virginia, I would be at home with him. I think it is ironic that he is telling me his insights, when so often I was trying to convince him of the very same concepts. My convincing very obviously didn’t work. Yikes, but here is the rub, I’m not here to complain about being taken for granted, taken advantage of, etc. ad nauseum.
Okay, to move on. I have been a manager for many years, and here is an issue that I periodically run across as I am supervising individuals and sometimes even groups. It’s a common and recognizable phenomena that all managers recognize, it’s the “Everything is fine as it is, why should we change?” Or the panicked “Everything is changing!” This is an indicator for the “taking for granted syndrome”. This is where and when folks get entrenched in the ‘way it is’. Performance is a non-issue for these folks because they have been in the same place for a long time and performance issues just have not been an issue. I see this as taking your job for granted. When you are in any relationship, whether it be your job, your supervisor, your wife, your lover and your mantra is “I am comfortable, don’t move, don’t change” then you are taking your situation for granted.
But it’s more than that. In all of these instances, we see a person developing a belief that being comfortable is good and that no personal stretching or effort is required. Nothing could be further from the truth, ask anyone who has ever been married and they will be happy to tell you that maintaining the status quo (marriage) is a very difficult chore. There is no comfort involved in being successful and happy marriages (for example) take work, take stretching and take personal growth. But, at no time ever, do happy marriages take for granted…
