Most of all, I want great happiness for them. Now that they are adults, I dare to be selfish and I also want great happiness for myself – which means that I would like for both of them to live right next door with their husbands and my grandchildren. So sometimes the great anxiety actually becomes fear and I think that I will not have them close and I will feel very sad.
I could move back to Norfolk – yes – but then I will miss my sons and my granddaughters. So I cannot find any way to NOT travel.
I wonder if we speak from the luxury of who we are. What I mean by that is that if I could not travel, would I yearn for traveling?
So, is irony just a means for us to express what is present within us? Ostensibly we are opposed to something which is exactly what we wish for? Or is it an indicator of how life sometimes pushes us around, making us think, making us look at the possibilities that are beyond our present thinking? Like, here is the way the universe is supposed to operate, but guess what, you’ve just been quarked on! You want X, but now you get Y! HAHA.