Archives for April 2014


Economic Equality – Not Yet

I was having a conversation with an acquaintance of mine and it seemed to be a repeat of many other conversations wherein I discovered that I do not adhere to the popular belief and that the conclusions I draw about our world are not so much the conclusions that other people draw.

I have witnessed so much economic inequality in this world, that I have drawn the conclusion that every opportunity that one has to improve another’s economy should be taken.  As a boss in today’s corporate world, I have done everything in my power to assure that each and every staff member benefits from my belief system about this.  There is no reason to be loyal to a corporation or an institution, there is every reason to be loyal to people.  I realize that shareholders in large corporations would not agree with this.  Witness, the latest McDonald’s debacle: staff who make minimum wage have been cheated out of overtime hours by supervisors who are loyal to McDonald’s the corporation.  This has resulted in a One BILLION dollar profit for McDonald’s shareholders.

On the other side of the coin are the millions of hard working people that work in the fast food industry (including 10s of thousands of single parents) who are suffering through poverty.  These human beings often do not know if they will have enough money to pay the electric bill, often, they do not have their own space, but rent rooms or tiny efficiencies from others.

When I speak with people, they refer to some esoteric belief that somehow, the universe is just, they use words like karma and “if it’s meant to be, it will be” to indicate that there is some fairness in the universe and we just have to wait to see it happen.

I believe that it is possible that the universe is just – I just do not believe that human beings are just.  The wealthy – all over the world – have proven for several thousand years that once they gain wealth, they will stop at nothing to keep gathering the wealth and to push other people down in order to gain more of their own wealth.

In America, we say that we are the land of the opportunity and that if you cannot build your own success then maybe you have not worked hard enough or you have not done enough in order to properly earn success.  I do not believe that this is true and I find it extremely difficult to believe that anyone can still believe this ridiculous lie after all that has happened in America in the last decade.

Foolish, mean, ugly, cheating, lazy people can be quite wealthy.  I know people who have never worked, nor thought about working, one day in their own lives, and they own vast amounts of wealth.  There are many, many people who are very, very wealthy who are guilty of terrible sins and there are many, many people who are wealthy and who gained that wealth by cheating from others (for example, McDonald’s shareholders).

My conclusion is that there is not justice living in this world unless humans apply it.  Karma and Jesus may save us, but that is not for this life.  For this life, we must find ways to save each other.


Have you ever noticed that if someone cannot give you what you want, they get angry with you?

It is as if their failing is somehow your fault.  Interesting.    Not “failing” as in weakness or shortcoming, but failing as in lack – how do you neutralize inability, indifference or unwillingness?

You cannot neutralize the word “fail” for others, of course.  However, do not change yourself because others cannot be happy with who you are or what you want.  If you want something and they are angry with you about it, do not take it personally.  You are not a bad person because you want something that you cannot have or because you want something that is difficult to gain.


Have you ever noticed that when you can’t give someone what they want, they get angry with you?

They don’t like you and start saying mean things to you or about you?

Why do humans do this?  When we are unhappy with someone and they will not produce our fondest wishes, we disparage them?  Why do we do this?  As humans, if we do not get what we want, why do we attack those people whom we need and/or love?

Why do we attack if people don’t agree with us or give us what we want?  We should not.  I say that we evaluate and allow the person off the hook… Often people say no to us out of mistaken beliefs that what we want is not good, or that they cannot provide us with what we want.  In any case, it is often not the fault of the naysayer that the answer is no – do not attack the person.


How Does it Feel to Have a Daughter This Beautiful?


Fait Accompli

On Monday morning he made fun of her and -it was as if- all of the trying and the striving left her in a big whoosh, like an exhaled breath long held and needing escape.  She no longer wanted to get “things” done; she no longer wanted to be anything other than what she could be.  She thought of all of the times he had made fun of her telling her that she was silly or misinformed or that her preferences were incorrect.  It occurred to her that all of that trying and striving really had brought her to nothing, because he still made fun of her in his sweetly disparaging way.  No matter what she thought about, she couldn’t get any of the trying to get things done, or the striving to be – back.  It was absent: a fait accompli, complete in its non-existence.  So, when it seemed like he could see that her motivation was gone, he made an offer, what could be called a “compromise” and still she could not find the will to care.  To herself, she said “do as you wish” to him, she only grimaced.

No matter what had happened so far in their relationship, it had been an external force operating on them as a couple, suddenly, it was their couple-ness that was operating against them.  She could see that no matter how much struggling you can do to be the ‘perfect whoever you are’, she thought that she personally, could never be enough.  She wondered how that would impact her heretofore perfect couple-ness.

Her life as she had known it had changed so dramatically since she had found him to be her mate.  The part of her that was interested in equality wanted his life to change just as dramatically, but not any of that ever happened and through no fault of his, she was left to drift further and further from the shores of her own happiness.  She could not find the purpose in her life anymore, she who had spent her entire life dedicating herself to her children and to those less fortunate than her.  Her mothering was over and her years as a therapist ripped from her grasp as surely as a cashier takes your money.  She was paid in full with no prize for the effort.

And so, she didn’t care, nothing mattered, so nothing mattered.  The loneliness was upon her.


Principles for Life

Love, Abundance, Integrity/Honesty, Oneness,



Dear Easter

March 2014It didn’t turn out at all as I thought it would.  Some days were actually crushing, bludgeoning my spirit with grief, sadness and even despair.

Still, here we are and Easter’s promise is as it always has been… spring time and the promise of rebirth.  The promise of hope that happiness returns, it may never be what it was before, but our hearts need not lay low because the past will never return to us.  We can embrace the new hope, the new spring time as it brings forth the fresh lush growth of colored flowers and green trees and fields.

The spring demands that we keep our heart open to new possibilities, possibilities that at first may not be recognizable.  We are creatures of habit and may not see or recognize the new love, the new life that springs forth to embrace us.  We must open our heart, our arms and let the new growth seduce us and then embrace us.  We must do this in order to keep the promise of spring alive in our hearts.

Then, when we know love, we must give it and be the instrument of love for others.  We must be the spring that others need to open their souls again to the sun.