It is What it is...,  Personal Growth,  Psychology of Life

This OR That

I was listening to my friend describe her new man friend and I began to get a bit uncomfortable.  According to my friend, her new boyfriend is a very generous man who gave his home and everything in it to his ex-wife.  He also told her about how generous he was to his ex-girlfriend showering gifts on her that she kept after they broke up.  As proof of his largesse he even showed my friend his ex-wife’s big beautiful house that he paid for.

My friend then proceeded to tell me how her new man friend reported being angry that women “always take advantage” of him.  He said that he is such a great guy and so generous that he gave everything away.  This has made him angry and explains why he has had angry outbursts with my friend…

No, I don’t think so – not any of it.  First of all, if you are generous, that is you giving to another.  Generous people do not get a return for their gift; that would belie the meaning of the word “gift”.  How is it possible to be taken advantage of, if you are giving?  The only explanation is that you expected something in return for your gift.  You expected a return on your investment – which again – is NOT a gift.

That is why I say this OR that, because either you are a generous soul who has given to other human souls freely – or more likely – a person who wants something in return for your monetary gifts to others.

4 Comments

  • S

    Yes, I agree !

    Sounds like a big crybaby and I will bet that this loser ‘gives’ to get something.
    I think that it’s a case of ‘giving’ to have TOTAL CONTROL over these people/women.

    Sounds like a guy I lived with who didn’t give freely and used a ‘bait and switch’ type of move while I thought I was living with someone that truly loved me.
    He only gave material things freely in order to have control and once he knew he had you in his grip/control then all those things slowly started disappearing. Bottom line BEWARE of these types too.

    He is quite a womanizer and a gamer and wanted attention because his own ego was so fragile because of his father and 1 of his older brothers.
    It was indeed hard to believe that someone 65 could still behave like such a child.

  • S

    There are no logical reasons or explanations for angry outbursts unless you refer back to your blog that explains why people who are not getting things or needs met of theirs have these type of outbursts of anger.
    Does this rationale fit the selfish profile you depicted in your older blog on this very subject ?
    Looks like it does to me

  • S

    Thanks Johanna
    I have enjoyed your blogs you are a very logical woman !
    I hope things turn out okay for your friend and the overly ‘generous’ man she dates cries himself to sleep at night alone ~ lol

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