Most people believe that denial and lying is primarily within the purview of the addict. However, lying and denying is for everyone! What sets the addict apart from the liars and denyers is what they believe in – not how honest they are. They say that an active addict has two core beliefs: 1) I am not an addict and 2) I can control my use. It is these core beliefs that make an active addict an active addict. Really though, how different is that than someone who is sick saying “I am not really sick.” How different is this than someone who is obese saying “I can eat ice cream, it won’t hurt me.”
This self-deception is pervasive in our culture, while you may say that it is an addict who is “unwilling to see those I hurt”, I have to say it is true of everyone! Who admits to hurting those people that they love? No one! Your behavior can be the nightmare of those you love. Know it.
I’ve written about this concept before. The concept of being challenged, the concept of feedback dished out and either received or not received: can have a profound effect on my life. I wrote about it when I wrote “Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely”. That story heralded the ending of some childhood idealism. Idealism that I had no idea was following me around. So here I am again pondering the idea of denial and how our loved ones play a significant role in sustaining and maintaining the denial, OR making significant disruptions by puncturing the denial with truth.
There is some science that says folks who don’t have severe hangovers are more likely to become alcoholics. Well I’m one of those people who have severe consequences and I just cannot drink. So addiction to alcohol – or really anything- has just not been my thing. However, I can say that the disease of denial has firmly entrenched itself into my life, in oh so many forms. One, I am guilty of believing that I KNOW how to raise kids and there is this specific formula that is correct from diaper to college and only I have the formula. I developed a know-it-all attitude that in spite of feedback about my attitude, I would say things to myself like “yes they have a point, but I AM doing it right”. So I’m not really addressing my parenting skills here, or even addiction, what I am addressing is my forcefulness about being absolutely right about everything I do and say.
Now the truth is, we as humans, will only think and do things that we believe are right. In all of those TV shows about criminals, you will always hear some justification from the criminals for their horrendous acts. That is the mind manufacturing evidence to justify their actions. As humans we want to be right. Being right allows us to march on continuing our activities, good, bad and ugly.
I have brought a “force” with me to everything I do. I needed that force when I was raising all of those kids. It takes tremendous strength and energy to herd so many young people around. I needed that force to be a fierce protector, many of those years I was a single parent, so strength of will was critical. That “force” is all unnecessary now. These people that I was raising and protecting are all grown up. They actually need to spend some of their time protecting me… So here I am with all of this righteousness and force with nothing to apply it to. I don’t even know how to raise children anymore. My kids, who have kids, are teaching me a thing or two about the flexibility of parenting. They are demonstrating to me cool new ways of raising kids that do not require many of the things that I absolutely insisted on. The sky is not going to cave in if a child drinks some Sprite, hell is not going to overflow with brimstone if the laundry is not completed on schedule. Most importantly; learning to trip, fall and cope with it is a necessary basic of becoming adult. I know that I preached allowing consequences, but that’s where the denial is hot and heavy for me. I wanted to protect my children and I kept on holding their hands, trying to ameliorate any hurt and remove any obstacles to their happiness.
What foolishness I have practiced. It’s not like I wasn’t challenged. Those who challenged me received such angry rebuttals, because of that “righteousness” bubble that I have resided within. I see now, in the 20-20 hindsight type of vision – that people will only challenge me because they love me. Who would tangle with the tigress if they didn’t give a damn about the tigress?
Like the addict living through the intervention, I have clawed and maimed the people who love me the most. I can’t completely surrender, because living through what others think of my life is just not my style. I do have to come to grips with this new perspective. People who challenge me do it out of care and concern for me. If the same theme repeats itself over and over again with different folks the probability that I am living in denial is close to 100%. So, was I wrong all those years utilizing my “force” to raise kids? No! Things change, time changes, raising children right now is very different than raising children 25 years ago. We did what we did and these new parents are doing a darn good job.
My place in the universe is different, it is I who must move on and let go of what was. That requires that I hear the challenges that others throw my way and that I respect that only those who love me will throw those challenges at me. I don’t want to be like those people I know who – in positions of power – surround themselve with sycophants who wouldn’t dare give honest feedback. I want to be surrounded by people who love me, who will challenge me and who will keep me out of denial and firmly fastened to the path of truth and honesty.
A friend and I were discussing that “thoughts create experiences” statement. My friend loves “The Secret” and works hard on a daily basis to keep his thoughts positive and upbeat. My friend says “feelings always create thoughts” and I keep arguing, no “thoughts create feelings”.
My belief is that it’s a circle, that is very serious business for how anyone experiences life. Belief is the operative word here. Because before thoughts, you have the beliefs. Research tells us that we will dismiss any thoughts or experiences that don’t align with personal beliefs. That means that no matter what is put before us we stay on one track.
Note: That is a reason for college and continued education. When in college you can’t help but come into contact with varying belief systems that do not align with your own. At that age, we can be open to those differing beliefs and develop flexibility that can serve us in the future.
Belief systems are ways that humans create feelings of security. Beliefs are thoughts that can be counted on. If a belief is supported by life then the belief and the structure created by the belief is congruent. If life does not support the belief and the structure then flexibility can allow for productive change and an adjustment to the beliefs. This will allow continued happiness. Inflexibility is a structure that creates frustration and anguish. Just talk with any couple who believes in marriage and yet finds themselves in the unbelievable struggle called divorce.
The circle is belief, thought, feeling, experience, belief, thought, feeling and experience. Belief creates the thinking and the feeling and the belief will always create thinking and feeling that aligns with itself. Beliefs are like pigs eating at a trough, don’t get in the way and don’t try to make them stop. It is only when disaster strikes that beliefs will open to examination.
A friend of mine was telling me about her and her daughter’s conversations with an attorney. My friend’s daughter was stuck in another state because she had a child with a man who lived in that state. The laws are quite clear about leaving the state with a child without the parent’s permission.
On their last phone call with the attorney, my friend heard quite clearly from the attorney “since he is not paying child support, nor seeing the child regularly, we can definitely see a way to argue within the court that the child will be better off if the mother is allowed to move home.” When her and her daughter consulted each other after the phone call, her daughter told her, “I told you mom, there is no way that I can move home, I simply won’t ever be able to leave this state until my son is 18.” My friend was so surprised that she could barely breathe. What she realized was that her daughter did not want to come home, she believed that she was better off where she was. Her daughter’s belief allowed her to hear exactly what she needed to hear to reinforce her belief and that was all. It could have been vice versa and my friend only heard what she wanted to hear, but the point of the story is that the belief creates the thinking and the experience. Both women were hurt and upset by the conversations.
The most important point of the entire discussion is that we learn how to discern a belief within our thinking. Learning how to tell the difference between thinking the same old things and seeing something new is a critical skill for adulting. We need to know when we are clinging to something that no longer exists (a marriage, or a job). We need to know when we can’t see the truth about a person who is important to us. We need to get out of our own way and recognize the blind spots.
Perhaps you know someone who lives in denial of a life situation. Is it frustrating for you? Your best friend’s husband is cheating and she won’t see it because he has always been so wonderful. The esteemed doctor is coming to work with alcohol on his breath and is making mistakes in diagnosing and treating. You don’t want to stop believing that the doctor is a good doctor, so you let him go on making awful mistakes, perhaps until it hurts someone.
We want our belief structures, and that’s okay. We just have to learn to call them what they are: beliefs, not facts.
A young and confused man who needs help with his injury is turned away from the emergency department after he is stabilized with no follow up care, because he has no insurance or money. He has a broken arm and cannot work for weeks, his injury heals incorrectly, causing a disability. This young man may feel and believe that people are hostile and do not care for others.
Contrast this with a wealthy and beautiful socialite who gets sick. Her environment will give her a social response of great care. The staff and her family will get medicine and soup for her and prod her to rest. This woman believes that people are good. Both thinkers are correct and yet both are incorrect. They are incorrect because they turn these events into belief structures.
People have perceptions based on where they are: struggling student vs successful businessman, stock market failure or middle-aged business woman, and who they are: married, widowed, woman, old man, gay, young girl.
The Construct of Belief Systems
Those perceptions are guideposts to belief systems and they are structured on those perceptions. Belief systems are the bedrock of our lives. They allow us to proceed with ease by helping us to not question each activity that we engage in with others. Illusions and biases are the construct for ensuring that the belief system persists throughout life.
For example, believing that you are a good person will make you act like you are good and it will also make you go to extreme measures to show how good you are. Guilt will be formed when this belief is faced with a reality that doesn’t match with these beliefs. This will create cognitive dissonance. In fact, the person stole cash from a friend and yet wants to believe in their own goodness. This person will have guilt. (Providing that the person has a conscience and is capable of feeling guilt.) Then they may deny the theft, or they may justify the theft by stating (to self) that the friend could afford the theft. Much has been written about denial.
If you are a human being, it will benefit you to understand the brain’s demand for structuring an actual foundation for beliefs. This demand for a belief structure can lead you to reinforce your beliefs in spite of counter evidence. Your bias can actually “bend reality” so that what has occurred in front of you, becomes your perception and not reality. We want our world to fit our pre-conceptions of reality.
How Perceptions Shape How We Treat Others
Perceptions and beliefs are how we treat ourselves as well as how we treat others. Perhaps the most painful part of perception as reality is dismissing the aging population in America. If you are over sixty you have experienced a younger person dismissing your knowledge, wisdom and abilities. If you are in the workforce, you have been supervised by someone who is younger than you – and that someone, inevitably has a negative opinion of anyone over 60. It’s a fact of life in America.
We paint the world with our perceptions. Our own experience becomes the way of the world. I have spoken with many who believe that their own experience defines the universe. I spoke with a woman about medical EHRs (electronic health records) and she was absolutely convinced that there was a national record system. It turned out that she had a physician who worked at a large practice where the doctors shared records. In other words, her personal experience dictated her beliefs, and she wasn’t open to the fact that others have different experiences. She had great difficulty grasping the fact that others had a different experience than her own. “Others” either don’t understand, or they have done something wrong.
This young woman often told me that because I am her mom, and “I had to” tell her that she was pretty, beautiful and amazing. I was right (of course), but, I was doubted, because I am a mom. Because moms are obligated to compliment their children, you shouldn’t believe a mom who is complimenting you.
When our beliefs align with Reality…
The truth is we know about the role that perception plays in life and in society. One of the reasons we love people like Professor Galloway (smart, genuine and generous) and Bonnie Raitt (talented, caring, brilliant musician) is because they really are what we perceive about them. Our perceptions did not make a mistake about these two human beings. They are what the presentation implies. This alignment gives our brain a rest. No energy has to be invested in making things right between our belief and the presentation. No cognitive dissonance occurs.
Who do you blame for all of the deaths caused by insurance denials? Some estimates are that thousands of humans die as a result of insurance coverage denial.
Who do we make responsible for death caused by insurance company denial? There is a perpetrator and there is a victim.
Remember when governor’s rejected Medicaid extension? Rick Scott told Floridians they didn’t need it. How would Rick Scot know? Rick Scott has never lived without the best healthcare available in America. He can afford it.
The healthcare discussion in public health became the number of deaths caused, in each state, where the Medicaid extension was denied. In Florida it was estimated that Rick Scott and the Republican state senators were responsible for 22,000 deaths because of the rejection of the Medicaid expansion.
Who really gets to be responsible for these deaths?
In America, when we shoot a man or shoot a woman we can count on going to jail. Why is this death more lethal than insurance malfeasance? It isn’t, insurance malfeasance kills tens of thousands of human beings. Those who deny insurance coverage are the murderers.
Now that we have witnessed the murder of the United HealthCare executive, all of the frustrated patients are expressing some of that frustration publicly. This morning, on TV, I witnessed the arrest of a Woman who said on a phone call, a frustrating phone call, to Blue Cross / Blue Shield “delay, deny, depose, you’re next”. Now the legal system is telling all of the humans who are suffering and even dying because of the insurance companies that they are wrong to express their frustration. The legal system has stepped in to protect the capitalists.
The situation in this country is health care for profit. If you, as a patient, don’t offer the health insurance company a profit, you will be denied, and you may die.
If you do express your frustration and pain you will be arrested for a ridiculous charge and your bail will be set at $100,000 dollars which, of course, you can hardly afford. You can’t afford bail because you have spent all of your family’s money on health care. But the system is protecting the capitalistic health insurance company that is causing your family pain.
United Health Care operating under the guise of capitalism and on behalf of shareholders is allowed to kill Americans. Now that the worst has occurred and the UHC CEO has been murdered, they will be using public tax dollars to enforce their reality onto the rest of us. They want to operate with impunity and now our own police officers will be threatening anyone who disagrees with our great capitalistic machine. Don’t dare express your anguish with the insurance company because you will be arrested.
We are angry. The health insurance industry is killing us. No one is listening.
Today is overcast and wet. Not quite raining, more, just wet. It is not a life-changing funeral for us. I send a prayer to the heavens for that.
Gulf of Corinth by Mary Newbold Sargent
Nevertheless, it is an important funeral for us. My husband’s best friend is being laid to rest today.
It is a tradition that I agree with. I believe it helps us with our many and varied feelings about life. We need the time to work through our relationship with the person who has passed away.
For some, it is an interruption in a conversation. The interruption could have been a furious argument, or it may have been a soul-searching declaration of love. For any interruption there will remain a sense of incompletion.
For others it is an end to a time in a life. For the child of, for the spouse of, it is an end to a time. It could be the end of a certain structure, a way of a family’s life. A central figure in the life of the family is gone and the family doesn’t know how to proceed.
For others it can feel like the end to life itself. Nothing will ever be the same again. Life is unalterably changed, different than it has ever been. And these are those who suffer the most with this grief, with this moment in time. These are those who have lost it all. Most can recover, some will not, instead will follow to the space of darkness, never to return.
We make the journey to meet all those affected in each different way. For us it is a struggle with mortality. Must death always win? Sometimes death comes with a plan, but other times it is all so sudden and cravenly wrong. Death can steal life in the brightness of day with no warning whatsoever.
We come to make our peace with the dead man. For this time, we are the lucky ones. Our life will not change with the passing of this man. He will be missed, but the missing will make no change here.
This funeral demands action
What we must do in this moment is to grapple with mortality. We must see our own death and our own plans for the day that we pass and thus change our family completely.
Mrika Selimi from Unsplash
The finality of death looms over us. It changes our experience of life. If we acknowledge death, we must admit that our denial and anger separate us from each other. Our separation becomes a decision that must be reviewed. Can we really live this life in full resentment of each other? Can we really abide without ever having a conversation with our loved one about our relationship or our pain?
We have to review our relationship decisions. We must acknowledge the gravity of our treatment of each other. It is a thoughtful time. It is a time of grief.
It struck me the other day, as I was scrolling through Facebook, that my friends who have dared not to move past their family of origin culture are the ones who are enamored with Trump. It’s a well known fact that the “less-educated” are statistically more apt to be Trumpers. But I never connected the dots in real time.
And then it struck me as I was scrolling. My girlfriend Debbie from 6th grade, back in Fruitville, shared some trump propaganda on my feed. Debbie has never left the life we led back in Fruitville. I don’t mean that she didn’t move, I mean that she stayed in the backwoods persona of the Florida girl. She never left the old neighborhood and the old culture.
Now it is true that the not-educated white people have a reason to be disenchanted with politics as usual. America is in the worst place it has been in a hundred years, both politically and economically. I am with them on the idea of getting rid of the same old rhetoric that has controlled our congress for a hundred years.
Trump is not the answer and to think he is the answer is to be an anti-intellectual. Debbie is the kind of person to vote for Trump because no one has ever crossed her path in any way that challenged her way of life. Whatever beliefs her mom and dad passed down are still stuck there in her and her family’s head. They are resisting computers, they are still fishing in the Everglades and they are all still beer drinkers or pot smokers. They don’t like reading, except maybe the newspaper, and never made it past high school in any meaningful way. She lives in the Fruitville culture cozy. There are a lot of people who are satisfied with life as it is. There is nothing wrong with this culture, it is simply stagnant. Thinking doesn’t happen, it’s a culture of thoughting. Everything I think of today, I also thought of yesterday.
I began thinking about some of my other friends who publish Trump propaganda and realized there was this common thread. They are culture complacent and culture cozy. And as is true to form, not college graduates either. They stayed in the same place, no matter how many years past high school they are. Some are literally, in the same place, they were forty five years ago.
To a great extent, these friends never realized that they were having life NOW, many of them planned for later and in their complacency, later never came. They are solid Trump supporters because for some reason, they believe that the man will help their situation. I’m not sure how or why that was supposed to happen, but I hope that they realize that it did not happen. Trump did NOTHING for the little guy. Trump never helped human rights, he never decreased taxes for the poor or middle class. He literally did very little for anyone other than himself and the wealthy during his presidency.
Because the uneducated can be *practiced* in denial, they are often caught arguing for Trump, when there is nothing to argue for. Trump’s policies did not, in any way benefit the poor in Florida, or in any other state. Unless you believe that the ability to carry an AR-15 is somehow important to your liberty, Trump did not help you.
I am disgusted by anything Trump. However, this country cannot continue to get away with raping the poor to the benefit of the rich.
TAX THE RICH — AOC by Nina Westervelt with New York Times
It just cannot continue. The middle class and the poor must have some breathing room. We need a raise of the minimum wage. We need free college education, free pre-k and free health care. We need to give Americans some of the same benefits that most western countries enjoy. Our country is poised for violence and hate, and it is armed to the hilt. As ignorant as Trumpers are, they are part and parcel of a group of people that are tired of being used by the big corporations and the billionaires.
The next uprising may be more violent, and believe me, if it happens, we will think that Trumpism was a walk in Central Park.
Have you been in situations where you are consistently ignored? You can be sure that those who are ignoring you have dismissed you. You have no importance to those who ignore you. They can’t be bothered with what you need. They actually cannot be bothered with you at all.
Make no mistake, those who ignore, also dismiss. Dismissing makes you less than human in the eyes of those who ignore you. This also makes it easier to ignore you. If you have no value, you can be pushed aside.
How is this interaction created? At what point do we allow ourselves to dismiss other humans?
Many people actually do believe that they are superior to other humans and so we don’t have to explain for those. We know why the “superiors” ignore human beings. They are often people who don’t recognize their own bad behavior.
For those who love and support others, why would they ignore other humans? Talking with others, I am told that often, people don’t have time for everything that they need to get done. Thus, they run through their days only focused on what they must. No one gets a pass for this busy person. They can only focus on the things on the list.
Others; simply do not have the energy to give another. You will find them ignoring others as a matter of survival.
It’s the first group that deserve disdain. Ironically, this is exactly their treatment of others and should be our treatment of all those who believe they are “better” than others. “Superiors” only concern themselves with self. They could care less what feelings they are causing the ignored person. They usually have no reason to believe they are superior – and believe it anyway.
Our minds love to be righteous, when we have a belief about superiority, we will find ways to confirm our belief. I’ve heard the arguments: “She’s ugly, he is clumsy, look how stupid they are!” On and on the arguments roll and they include no self reflection. They are simply expressions of the baser parts of the human brain.
If you are being ignored and dismissed, you can make some choices. You may know the person who is ignoring you, if you do, you may know if 1, 2 or 3 is the source of the ignoring. It helps to know, and it does make a difference to how you respond.
To respond to #1 which is the most insidious of moods of Americans, is to be aware that you are with an extremely rude person. Treat them so. You don’t have to do anything, in fact, perhaps you can ignore them back.
To respond to #2, you can be respectful with your interruption. This person is struggling.
To respond to #3, don’t.
It really is awful to be ignored. Dismissing is a way of telling some one “you don’t matter to me”. Don’t be this person.
It’s the New Year and we are all ready to change our lives! I’m making 2020 the easiest year to change your life by giving you 20 Ways to make it happen.
To change your life, say yes to Love.
Love centers every interaction with calmness. When you love everyone, it changes how you think of them. It changes how you think of yourself.
To change your life, say yes to Abundance.
The world is full of abundance and anything you can wish for is available. Believing in abundance gives you abundance. Commit to challenging and changing beliefs that limit you by being about scarcity.
To change your life, say yes to Honesty.
Lies are obvious, you must be in denial to believe them. It is hectic and stressful to sustain lies, even if you are the receiving party. Honesty is easier and healthier. I dive deeper into honesty in this article, or refer to this book on the justification of lies.
To change your life, say yes to Responsibility.
Responsibility will bring you security. When you decide on responsibility, you give yourself a home and something to build upon. Do your part for those you love. If that means doing dishes, or picking up your dirty socks, do it!
Mermaid Walking
To change your life, say yes to Action.
Procrastination stops you from accomplishment, why indulge in procrastination? Step out of your own traps and complete your chores. Adopt the mantra “20 ways to change your life in 2020” to combat procrastination.
To change your life, say yes to Boundaries.
When you work, work.
When you play, play.
Circumscribe your activities with purpose.
Consciously choose what you absorb.
Focus on the moment, in the moment.
To change your life, say yes to Relaxation with a purpose.
Find your relaxation response, explore meditation, or yoga, or massage and acupuncture. Whatever your relaxation response is, use it.
To change your life, say yes to Yourself.
If you need to rest and recuperate, “No” is a complete sentence, say it.
Darkness is for Resting
Say yes to getting rid of your mad.
One event deserves only one mad: spend it wisely.
Don’t regurgitate your mad over and over and over again.
Once you have completed your mad, move on and don’t dwell. What you pay attention to absorbs your energy. You don’t want anger to be your calling card.
Where your attention goes, energy flows.
To change your life, say yes to Forgiveness
It has been said that unforgiveness is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. Science tells us that unforgiveness leads to bitterness and that bitterness kills. Emmett Fox is the spiritual thought leader with extensive writing on forgiveness. If you want to explore the idea of forgiveness more, check out his book on Amazon.
To change your life, say yes to Self Love.
Be loving to yourself in thoughts, words and deeds.
Do whatever it takes to remind yourself that you matter and deserve love just for being you.
Don’t deny your true worth.
Do what you know is best for you.
To change your life, say yes to Self Care.
Stay on top of your stress, be aware of consequences of stress and take measures to ameliorate your stress! The 20 ways to change your life in 2020 is all about self care, you can incorporate any one of the ways into your self care routing.
Self Care
To change your life, say yes to Respect for yourself and others.
All interactions become positive with the addition of respect.
To change your life, say yes to Oneness.
Allow yourself to see that your spirit is a part of the whole; when you see this, your place in the universe becomes infinite and purposeful.
To change your life, say yes to Non-Violence.
Violence can be verbal, physical, mental or emotional. Leave violence behind to live longer and to keep your loved ones close. Violence separates humans from each other.
To change your life, say yes to Integrity.
The definition of integrity is the state of being whole and undivided. How wonderful it is to be clear and purposeful about your decisions in life?
To change your life, say yes to Imperfection.
Perfection will cost you your peace of mind. Allowing yourself to embrace the ups and downs of life will give you freedom.
Accept that you are perfectly imperfect.
To change your life, say yes to Communication.
Don’t leave relationship pain hanging. Pain leads to bitterness and we already know what bitterness does to us.
Unknown source
To change your life, say yes to Present.
Say good-by to the past. Science tells us that our memories are unreliable; it just doesn’t pay to look back and second-guess yesterday.
To change your life, say yes to Sleep.
Put your phone in the kitchen every night. The only exceptions are family member hospitalization, stock market in Japan or teenager out at a party. These exceptions are singular in nature, you can still place your phone in the kitchen at all other times.
Love centers every interaction with calmness. When you love everyone, it changes how you think of them.
Say yes to Abundance.
The world is full of abundance and anything you
can wish for is available. Believing in
abundance gives you abundance.
Commit to challenging and changing beliefs that
limit you.
Say yes to Honesty.
Lies are obvious, you have to be in denial to
believe them. It is hectic and stressful
to sustain lies, even if you are the receiving party. Honesty is easier and healthier.
Say yes to Responsibility.
Responsibility will bring you security. When you decide on responsibility, you give
yourself a home and something to build upon.
Say yes to Action.
Procrastination stops you from accomplishment, why
indulge in procrastination?
Say yes to Boundaries.
When you work, work.
When you play, play.
Circumscribe your activities with purpose.
Consciously choose what you absorb.
Focus on the moment, in the moment.
Say yes to Relaxation
with a purpose.
Find your relaxation response, explore meditation,
or yoga, or massage and acupuncture.
Whatever your relaxation response is, find it and use it.
Say yes to getting rid of your mad.
One event deserves only one mad: spend it
wisely. Don’t regurgitate your mad over
and over and over again. Once you have
completed your mad, find a way to solve your feelings and be committed to your
resolution.
Where your attention goes, energy flows.
Say yes to Self
Love.
Be loving to yourself in thoughts, words and
deeds.
Do whatever it takes to remind yourself, that you
matter and deserve love just for being you.
Don’t deny your true worth.
Do what you know is best for you.
Say yes to Respect for yourself and others.
All interactions become positive with the addition of respect.
Say yes to Oneness.
Allow yourself to see that your spirit is a part of the whole, when you see this, your place in the universe becomes infinite.
Say yes to Non-Violence.
Violence can be verbal, physical, mental or emotional. Leave violence behind to live longer and to keep your loved ones close. Violence separates humans from each other.
Say yes to Imperfection.
Perfection will cost you your peace of mind. Allowing yourself to embrace the ups and downs of life will give you freedom.
Accept that you are perfectly imperfect.
Say yes to Integrity.
The definition of integrity is the state of being whole and undivided. How wonderful it is to be clear and purposeful about your decisions in life?
